Either we are familiar with a person who changed or disappeared into his or her relationship or we have been down that road.

Today, it is easy for me to write on this topic because I had been the one who completely drowned in a relationship, once.

There can’t be any successful relationship if you continue to be lost in something you happen to call a “relationship“. If you are not aware about this, then go through the points below to know whether or not you are lost in your relationship.

What to look out for?

Being in a relationship shouldn’t be a job. If it feels like one, then it is time you get a reality check. Go through the below mentioned signs to see whether or not it’s true.

1. Compromise is not the key.

Of course, both the partners should meet each other somewhere in the middle of any discussion, point or argument. But, does that mean you give up on your happiness for his/her? Absolutely not.

Do the things that once brought you joy. Visiting your friends, watching movies, shopping or anything at all. If your partner doesn’t enjoy these activities, then it is fine for you to do it alone.

You shouldn’t always postpone your favorite pastime to make room for what they want to do. If you have been doing it so far then that is the first sign.

2. Two people, two personalities.

Have you heard someone say to you that you are becoming just like your partner? Then there is your second sign. If this is something that has been happening, then trust me dear you are not you anymore.

If you have replaced yourself with “we” then how is it your identity? Don’t ever let who you are be undermined because you happen to be in a committed relationship.

3. Always together.

Being in a relationship doesn’t mean you have to be together all the time. Are you spending each and every day of your life with your partner? Sounds romantic but it really isn’t.

There needs to be some time of the day that you keep aside for yourself. Even in your alone time if you are constantly worried about your partner then the relationship you are in has started taking a toll on you.

You need some alone time every week. This will help you concentrate on your life as well.

4. Your dreams have left you.

It is something that you shouldn’t be proud of. Ever. If you have left behind your goals, ambitions and dreams for the happiness of your partner. Then, I am sorry to say you have completely lost yourself.

Your dreams, goals and ambitions define you. Without all of that you are no one. It is never okay to let go off your dreams.

5. Your happiness isn’t intertwined.

Your emotions aren’t connected together. You might feel sad or happy if they do so but to feel it as intensely as they do isn’t really good. To feel you are about to break down because they are going through a bad phase isn’t a good sign.

Your love interest shouldn’t be everything all the time. If you feel happy because he/she is happy or feel you are about to collapse because they got a bad news then it is time you get a reality check.

6. That voice in your head.

Every time something goes wrong in your life then you get to hear that voice in your head say the right thing. We often avoid the things that this voice tells us. But, it is time you don’t.

If that voice is shrieking and telling you that something is terribly wrong, then it is time you stop and listen to it. Stop and ask yourself what feels so wrong.

7. Who is taking your decisions?

You are mature enough to take your life decisions. Be it as small as what to order in a restaurant to where you want to go on weekends, it can be anything. You are supposed to take your own decisions.

Don’t ever be so dependent on your partner that you fail to take your own decisions. This is another sign that you are getting lost in your relationship and it is time you to wake up.

8. You have lost your cool.

Were you this person who always had everything together? Yes, I said “were”. Because now you are nothing like that.

You are always on edge and feel that you have started to lose your ability to analyze any situation without bursting out into bouts of emotion, then you are sinking under your so-called relationship.

You are always finding ways to make your relationship last which is causing problems in other sectors of your life.

9. Your loved ones feel you are not the same.

If your friends and loved ones feel that you are no more the person you once used to be, it is time to think about it. Why do you think that is? Of course, you have friends who have known you for a longer duration than your partner.

If they think you are changing at an alarming rate, then it is time to understand you are getting lost in your relationship.


I want you to love and be loved but make sure you understand your relationship should bring you joy rather than causing you pain.

If it is always keeping you on edge or you no longer understand who you are then please take care of it. You still have time to get yourself together and be an individual with outstanding personality in your relationship. Good day.

© cover image: freepik.com